WHINEY BITCH

So today I got what I've been wanting for a very, very long time: a day off from everything. No rehearsal, no gig, just a shitload of snow and nowhere to go. Never took a shower, stayed in my jammies all day and washed my sheets. So I'm sitting here now at 6:30 and I'M BORED OUT OF MY FUCKING SKULL. Dude, it's Saturday night and I should be singing somewhere.

I've watched all my new Netflix DVD's and here's my review for ya:



KISSING JESSICA STEIN

I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED THIS MOVIE! It was so cute. It made me want to be a lesbian! Of course, the only lesbians that have ever made themselves available to me were a 7ft tall black woman with a cane who went by the name "Sweet J" and a completely drunk and stinky woman who slobbered all over me after a gig once. Slim pickin's in the lesbian arena for me. Besides, I'm not a lesbian - no matter how much I want or would try to be, it just ain't gonna happen. Anyhow, I thought the acting was really great, very funny, and although the end isn't what you wanted it to be, but you're still happy with it. So go on out and rent this cute little chick flick.



CHICAGO

I was thoroughly unimpressed with this. I think that's the problem with watching after it's gone through so much hoopla: you expect so much and get let down. To be fair, I thought Catherine Zeta Jones was great. Now speaking of lesbians, if I had to choose - she would be it. She is SO beautiful. Anyhow, I thought her performance was perfect - right on the money. I know the show, so I already knew the characters. Her voice doesn't blow you away, but it's very sultry and full-bodied and I just really like it. Plus, she danced her ass off.

Renee Zellwegger, on the other hand, OY. First of all, somebody get that girl a sandwich. Cripes - she's too damn skinny. Next, her singing voice was annoying. Having the forsight of knowing how much studio magic can be done to alter things, I try to listen past that and that girl ain't got much in the pipes department. She looked absolutely uncomfortable in every dance sequence she had. Some might argue that she was playing her character, Roxie - who has no apparent talent, but I think she was just playing Renee. Plus, her squinty eyes annoy me.

Richard Gere always seems to be the same dude to me in every movie. Time has not been good to him, either. His voice made me want to take a cheese grater to my ears. That's all I have to say.

Queen Latifah can do no wrong in my eyes, but holy crap were her breasts ENORMOUS in this movie. She's so sassy, I just love her.



MONSTER'S BALL

This movie was tough for me. There was a lot of death in this. Not in the gruesome, violent way - but in the human way. The way we lose loved ones and the pain that lingers around that. Although the situations were different, it was still difficult because of all the death I'm been dealing with lately (my grandfather, my dog). I'm not a Billy Bob Thornton fan, but he was just amazing in this. The character was really complex and sad and he just did an amazing job, I have to give him props.

Halle Berry. Hmm. Good performance? Absolutely. Oscar worthy? Nope.

I can't say I liked this one because I was crying and dealing with my own shit while watching it. I will say it's intense and would recommend it if you're looking for that kind of thing.

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I was just watching TV I've decided that I have a bone to pick with Steven Segal. WHY is this man able to keep acting? I mean, he's just awful in every way. The dude cannot act worth crap and I feel uncomfortable looking at him. He's just ODD looking. And for the love of God, cut off that ponytail and stop greasing your hair! Is this dude Asian or not? I can't tell. He's the real ancient chinese secret He looks to me like an big oaf of an Italian guy that wears a lot of asian robes and shit. He just makes me uncomfortable. WHY???? I'm sorry.



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I found this very amusing. I didn't actually READ it because I started snoring after the first two sentences. It's all about math - which may as well be hieroglyphics for me. I can picture Wes really enjoying this and taking out his pencil and paper to figure this shit out. The difference is, Wes is weird in that he's this brilliant MIT math guy, but he's also totally hot. The journal dude - I dunno....maybe other math girls find him hot. He probably makes a shitload more money then me, so I should just shut the hell up. But hey, if you've got a math fetish, go check him out.

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I'm having the Mr. X thoughts again. Oy. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I've dissected all of these things in my head a gazillion times. In all of the time we were together, he never fought for me. He never asked for me back or asked to forgive him for being a dick. Essentially what that says is "you're not worth shit to me. If you come around again - great, but I can't be bothered to make you feel like you're worth a little sacrifice of pride on my part."

I know you've all got your own analysis' of why I hang on, and I'm sure in part you're right. I've made the decision that I just CANNOT fix this again, and it won't get fixed unless *I* fix it. I've put my heart on the line SO many times for him and he just takes advantage of me over and over and over again. I came to the realization of something he's known all along: that when he retires next year, he's moving and I'll never see him again. I wanted to move with him and to share that part of his life with him, but that was never his intention. I was just the good-time girl. Still, I miss the guy I had good times with. He did love me in the beginning, but I think that just faded for him. This time of year is hard for me. I've already lost two loved ones, and I'm still dealing with a myriad of health issues.

There was a line in Monster's Ball where Hank says to Letisha when they're lying in bed "I'm going to take really good care of you," and she replies with "Good, because I really need to be taken care of right now." Whoa - that did it for me. I need to be taken care of right now too. I just feel like there's so much grieving in my family right now and then having to grieve over a love lost - it just blows. I need someone to take care of me emotionally. I'm tired of having to be strong all by myself. But hell, even when I was with him I had to be strong all by myself.

I don't even know what the hell I'm saying. End point: I'm not with him, nor will I fix it again. I just can't.

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I've done 6 loads of laundry today. My dad came over and snowplowed my driveway for me, wasn't that nice? My dad's the best.

Alright. Gotta go - my dad gave me his "Pearl Harbor" DVD and insists I watch it.
- posted by Taunia @ 7:04 PM